Stressing about Potential Stress

Grad school. Two words, so very daunting.

I’m being bombarded with everyone’s opinions about it. Facts about applying, survival, and the very discouraging stats about getting a job afterwards. The long, long haul of poverty while slaving (or near to it) in the lab for 80 hours a week.

I might be able to do it. I’ve decided to do a Master’s before PhD to convince myself that I’ll have some tools before signing myself up for this necessary hell whose gates stand before becoming the PI I dream about, who researches climate change biology, botany, and evolution. In addition to those tools, maybe I can convince myself about having the ability to defeat the impending obstacles I can’t foresee.

Wow, I actually have a headache just thinking about this.

Where do I fit in the fun before this? How do I convince myself that volunteering in Europe and farming for free won’t turn off potential PI’s and facilitate the happy dissipation of college knowledge? It’d be SO different if I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. Or if I wanted to pursue something that didn’t indicate grad school as a prerequisite, like writing or cooking. I love science, but I absolutely loathe the jungle gym of stress and competition that governs it like a dictatorship.

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